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Saturday, July 25th, 2009

Time:11:17 am.

My day.

Wake up, think about Damon Albarn. Dig out clothes to wear from pile. Change underwear? Fuck it. Do I wear blur shirt today? Fred Perry? Is wearing Fred Perry shirt with Fred Perry bag and Fred Perry shoes too much? Would it make Damon Albarn laugh?  Never eat breakfast. have growling stomach by lunch but use hour for driving around Orange County listening to blur and gorillaz and other things. Work in library, borrow many books. Do I want to become a librarian? I have gone as far as I'll can go before actually going to library school. This'll be alright. Yeah. Maybe I'll start acting! hahaha. Oh, I used to do art. Do I still want to? No, I want to think about Damon Albarn having sex with Graham Coxon.

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Tuesday, December 9th, 2008

Time:12:59 pm.

I have been up since 2:00 this morning.

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Thursday, August 7th, 2008

Subject:Comic Con and X-files
Time:2:25 am.
So Comic Con was... comic con. Hmm... bought some Tank Girl Comics and got an autograph from Chynna who is the shit, and a Batman pen that shoots out the Batsignal when you push a button. Pictures!



Hmm.. I felt personally insulted by the X-files movie. It was AWFUL. SOOO BAD, it was the worst movie I had seen in a long time. I hate HATE it SO MUCH. Carrie and I wear squirming in our seats and we couldn't help but make snide comments. God. It spat in my face, and I haven't cared about the x-files in 5 years. like, if Damon Albarn were to become a Scientologist and then go on the Surreal Life, it would be that bad almost.

I was supposed to go to Las Vegas last weekend with Carrie to visit Audrey and Jan but Carrie's ride needed new breaks and I couldn't take my car because it would start drama.
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Tuesday, July 22nd, 2008

Time:1:59 pm.
Magic Castle Cont.

It deserved more than that few sentences. So this place was formerly a hotel converted into a magic venue. Strict dress code, so I wore this weird red outfit because I am insane. In the car we had tacos and breaded shrimp. Paul is basically my boyfriend now and it scares the shit out of me because the idea of "boyfriend" terrifies me, like that's why I have had an imaginary boyfriend (Damon) for like, 10 FUCKING YEARS now. Oh god, Damon. I love him.

Damon. Damon damon damon. What was I talking about?

Damon... I think I am actually getting worse as time goes on. how is that possible? I spent 6 hours this morning masturbating. it was wonderful.

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Monday, July 21st, 2008

Time:9:46 am.
Damn it has been a while. I haven't been updating because I am so fucking lazy.

Camille finished the album so now there is a record in existence that has me on it. Excellent.

Camille's birthday was on the 3rd and we spent the whole day drinking and watching Star Trek movies. Joerund and i went shopping the day previously 'cause Camille wanted piles of presents. Unfortunately we were both flat broke so she gave us some cash for her own presents :( but it was all good. I can't fucking believe the bank charged me like 10 times for overdrafting. I called and complained and they took like 6 of them off. ha! they weren't even supposed to, really but I complain well.

DAMON: i went to see that Bananaz movie. I went all the way to Scotland and traveled like 8 fucking hours to see this thing. It was amazing. beforehand I was like, okay, this movie will be the end of my obsession because he's going to be dorky and arrogant. but it turns out I like dorky and arrogant so I wanted to lick his face the entire time. I was the first person in the theatre (naturally). And then this group of fucking film nerds come into this like, completely empty theater and sit right next to me. Jesus Christ. Anyway, the movie: damon vomits again. damon steals jamie's underwear. damon has stinky farts.

Then I went to see Honest Jon's Chop Up! with Camille and it was amazing! Goddamn it Damon Albarn. sometimes I get fucking sick of being this obsessed but I fucking love him. He sang Sunset Coming On and Camille and I held hands. There was a girl who sat next to us who was BIG. I was like, Camille, that girl's here for damon. i can hear her heavy breathing. She's so horny for it, I can tell. I was like, ENEMY DESTROY. We had to leave a bit early 'cause we had no place to sleep :( but I didn't know it was going to continue after the concert. oh well. later I saw a picture of the girl with damon... and i was like, fuck you, you fat bitch. FUCK YOU

And then... I came home and my Swedish family were visiting. So we went shopping because the dollar is so weak they went shop crazy. They were like, "Why didn't you visit us?" and I'm like, I was worried they wouldn't let me back in England, like for serious.

Linda took me to a veggie restaurant and it was good and we are changing our moving plans. we are going to san francisco now, because fuck portland, it is played out. then we went Doctor Who-ing with Paul, Orion, and Neil. I feel asleep halfway through because of my jet lag. They sounded like they were having a good time though. We're going to go to Comic Con but we don't know which days really. When is that? Is that this weekend? Shit. I STILL HAVEN"T GIVEN THAT ARTIST THE MONEY SO SHE CAN MAKE MY BLUR DRAWING. SHIT.

Went to see a horrible movie about horrible LA with Mike. We were the only people in the room save one, but like fuck that person we pretended he wasn't there and talked all through it. The movie was uncomfortable to watch. so bad. Garden Party. only people who are like, I Hate LA will enjoy the movie, but hating LA is like, so LA.

Then went to see BATMAN AND IT WAS SO AMAZING!!! I had dinner with Nikki at "eat." which is a pretentious fucking restaurant, obviously. Before that we went to see a friend's house in like, Hollywood Hills and SHIT it was swank, like $1,000,000 home. I was like, Fuck. Then we saw Batman at Cinerama Dome next to Amoeba Records. There was like, 2000 people there. went all out. ooo it was worth it.

Yesterday went to Magic Castle with Paul, Josh, and... shit. I forget. Anyway, saw like, 6 hours of magic shows. Also a posh place. Saw... um, George Costanza. Dressed completely in red, red dress and red tights. I want to do magic again.
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Saturday, July 12th, 2008

Time:8:19 pm.
damon damon damon damon damon damon damon damon damond daomnd dmaon damond admonad mdaond
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Wednesday, June 4th, 2008

Time:3:23 am.
England England England
I've seen the sun a grand total of like, 3 times since I've been here and I've been here like 2 weeks.

Camille and Jorund are ill and I am not. Weird! And there's even a cat around.

I'm in Ely near Cambridge which is very englandy. But I don't find myself very impressed by old pretty buildings, I never had. I am impressed by the availability of booze, though. We've gotten drunk at the pub that is about 5 steps away from the house twice last weekend. It was Jorund's birthday so we are excused. Also the other day was a saturday so that is also an acceptable reason to get drunk and wander the streets in search of "I'm drunk!" food. We wrote a song for his birthday... I haven't written a song in a long time.

Also where is Damon Albarn? Why is he so far away? :( Also I must also be mistaken because Graham Coxon would never call Damon "Gaymon" because that is ridiculous. I am wrong. I must be.


Camille says I talk about Damon Albarn less but that was while I was thinking about Damon Albarn (i would say more but that's impossible).

I got an expensive haircut and I really like it! I should have said, "Gimme that hot commie woman's haircut in Indiana Jones" but it's okay because that's sorta how it came out anyway.

Going to Norwich and rehearsing. Gig on Monday!
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Tuesday, May 13th, 2008

Time:12:14 am.
Hello I am going to England again in about a week so... if you are around
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Monday, April 14th, 2008

Time:9:20 pm.
flickr memeCollapse )
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Friday, November 16th, 2007

Time:8:36 pm.
i am thinking of feeding cookies to damon albarn so he gets nice and fat.

"cookie? cookie? do you want another cookie?"
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Tuesday, October 2nd, 2007

Time:7:02 pm.
So I have been absolutely shitting myself about this blur reunion. My heart beats too fast I can't like, begin my futile search of london. like, I don't want information, I will explode. It's like, I want to know, but I need not to know for my health and the health of others. my bandmates already think I am insane they don't need me rolling around on the floor screaming and having conversations with walls, and gasp actually, fucking, really, honest-to-god stalking someone.

oh and we played a gig last night in Shoreditch, it was okay. The sound engineer was like totally hot and French and he wore a black wifebeater. I think after I played he had more respect for me than before I played, which is a compliment, I guess. Goddamn he was a fine piece of man. He gave me tape for my cords and wanted to help me with my stands. Oh, I have to go back there I think one of my keyboard stands might have been left there. I feel so lonely at these gigs. Being a musician is such a boys club.

am I really that obsessed with Damon Albarn that I scare people? I think so.

I feel like I haven't been doing anything because I haven't bought anything.

goddamn it blur...

fuck it I'm going out I don't know where, Damon Albarn is not going to show up at my door
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Saturday, September 29th, 2007

Time:11:21 pm.

Come see us play if you can!
It will be like totally awesome
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Sunday, September 23rd, 2007

Subject:First Week in England
Time:7:54 pm.
We got a van and loaded all our shit into it and drove up to Liverpool and played for about 10 people and then all the motherfucking hotels were full and then we had to sleep in the van and I ate an entire FUCKING pizza. But we had a good lunch and drank so much that three of us had to pee on trees and I was laughing at them. You know when you have to pee so bad that you start making sex sounds when you get relief? hahaha. Spoke to a Ladyton person about keyboards. Namedropping! awesome. Also Camille got into a little car accident right outside of the venue, grazed the side of one with the employee's parked cars. Hilarity!

Back in London went to some clubs, and I guess I forgot how incredibly dorky clubs are. And supposedly that was a really cool one, people were crowding around the door fighting to get in. Fucking Shoreditch. Surrounded by douches. We had our own party in an alley by the stinking club with some Spanish, Northern Irish, English, American (obviously), and a couple of bums. More drinking, a teeny tiny bit of coke, ha. The next night we went to another club and our friend got seriously felt up by this guy, he grabbed his tit then caressed his cheek and then patted his ass. But what made us leave was that they played the same strokes song twice in like, fifteen minutes. so fuck that.

Goddamn it I am still farting, is it the cheese?
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Sunday, September 16th, 2007

Time:3:11 am.
Okay, first updated in a while. So here's a list of shit I've been doing, since... shit! getting a picture with Damon? That was a long time ago:

1. Went to Las Vegas to visit Audrey and see Patrick Wolf. We went to one place and they said it was canceled or some shit, but that was like BULLSHIT because I fucking spoke to No Bra the opening act the previous night in San Diego with Camille (it was soooo good) and she/he (it was like a man with tits who wore no shirt and... no bra) said they were going to be in Las Vegas. So I picked up a newspaper and started calling venues I thought Patrick could be and was eventually successful. Then we met Patrick on the street (Audrey didn't recognize him at first, haha) and told him of our woes and got a picture. Then we met a couple of girls who were being chatted up by the drummer and got in free, which made us feel pretty cool actually. Also didn't have to pay for the San Diego show which was awesome. Knowing and talking to people gets you free shit! I should get lots of friends so I get lots of free shit and presents on my birthday and Christmas. Those girls were funny. We were all like, "This drummer is soooo not cool," but everyone was like "maybe we'll meet Patrick" but he was hiding in the U-haul the whole time, for serious. I am blaming that girl in the front row. Me and her, we were having problems with each other. We never spoke one word to each other but we knew we enemies. We could tell that the other represented everything that we hate. She was underage like the girls we met but acted like she was hot shit because she got in and was constantly waving to her friends who had to wait outside like an evil bitch. And then she kept on rubbing her tits in front of Patrick, but not so much to get attention from Patrick but to be seen by people getting attention from Patrick. Douche factor of the charts.

2. Gig At Belly Up: all of our moms were there which is so impossibly cute it's like a baby unicorn. First time playing keyboards on a proper stage, too. Then we got really trashed, ate ice cream.

3. Comic-Con: got in as press courtesy of my friend Orion. Friends = free shit. Incredibly crowded. Met Darth Vader, Chynna who draws my favorite comics, and... someone who played someone in Doctor Who. Also helped interview some Torchwood people. Mostly just bought a lot of shit and ate incredibly bad food (except for a Thai place which was A-MAZE-ZING) and got drunk every night with Neil (funner than the comic-con, actually). Found a comic on britpop but I hated it because it was so bad. The comic was like the girl in the front row at Patrick's Las Vegas concert. I think it was supposed to be some meta thing were the readers/writer know that it's about douches, but come on I don't want to read about douches, esp. music douches because they are the second to worst kind (film douches #1). Also Damon Albarn was a malevolent God of some sort, which was funny but would have been much better if the characterization resembled him, even a little bit. As it was, it was kind of lazy, and mistook in-jokes for insight. Also, the douches had magical powers because music is magic... and no one understands music like douches so they can harness music's magical power? Sorry, wrong! everyone who loves, listens, plays music knows how music can be magical. douches only know how music can be manipulative. now, if i met a douche who actually truly loved music i might change my mind, but that's like meeting an animal lover who habitually drowns kittens and kicks puppies. god i hate douches

4. Camille's b-day: Jackie, Neil, Camile, and I attempted to find a good place in... Solana Beach? to get drunk but failed. We did however find a mediocre place. Camille was awash with awesome gifts. hahahha Neil got her a pinata. it took forever for the pinata to break open, but when it did... there was no candy inside, because Neil is british, and they do have have pinatas in Britain. I guess he thought we hit a cardboard animal-shaped box until we destroy it for no reason but the joy of it.

5. Wait... so am I officially the person someone goes to if they want to sexually experiment? Was there an announcement made when I wasn't in the room? "Attention: Joanna will do anything" or was I not listening? was I too busy giving head? oh i remember. it was me. i told everyone. ha!

6. Went to Carrie's to give her b-day gift: sonic screwdriver. Had dinner at a friends house, they smoked out and I played guitar hero really really loudly. Police came due to noise complaint but saw that I was an attractive white girl and left. Apparently did not see 5 foot bong in corner of room. whatever. shit! i've known these friends for like 10 years. woah man that's cool.

7. Got totally annihilated at an 80s club in LA with Alia. There is no other way to get completely shitfaced. No other. Got so drunk I convinced myself a boy resembled Damon Albarn and flirted with him constantly. So hungover the next day. The boss gave me some tylenol and made me go home. whatevah it was my last day anyway

8. OoOOooO I am in London currently and will be in UK through October. Me and the boys are badly jetlagged. and i have been having the worst case of gas EVER. I don't think I've been like this since I was in high school. Every three minutes I fart. On the plane I was constantly farting and I couldn't sleep. from 9:00 PM to whatever the fuck I couldn't fucking sleep because I had the farts. I was so fucking out of it I took the wrong bag. i was like WHAT THE FUCK. Then I had to return it the next day. while writing that paragraph I farted about 3 or 4 times. ha. i just farted right then and the smell is horrible.
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Friday, August 10th, 2007

Time:2:14 am.
so I'm heading to London around Sept. 14th-ish and staying through October, doing band stuff like gigs and shit very cool.

FATIMA where are you? God I miss you. and Thomas. ahhh! THOMAS.

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Sunday, May 27th, 2007

Time:5:31 pm.
okay like interest stuff has been happening... but I'm going to be writing about them later.

Right now, Alex James:

"However, there were lots of fans milling around the hotel. I decided to invite some of the prettiest ones to come up to my room.

I'd calculated I'd need five for a bottle of champagne that big. After ushering them in, I collapsed on the bed and let them cover me in champagne and kisses.

I stopped having sex occasionally, but only so that I could have some more drugs."

I love you Alex. kisses kisses kisses

seriously. Audrey was like, "I would feel bad if I knew so-and-so took advantage of groupies" or something... and I was like "Cute boys in bands taking advantage of groupies? Actually it's the other way around, or at least when it's done properly." I don't think they have been proper groupies since indie/alternative music got all popular and mainstream and it's a damn shame. Damn damn shame. They still exist of course, but a self-deluding type that bears little resemblance to say, the plastercasters. Bands these days have got a large stick up their asses. Can you imagine someone going around and making a cast of say, Thom Yorke's penis? Damn shame. Indie people are damned puritans.
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Monday, May 14th, 2007

Subject:Camille Davila@ the Whistle Stop!
Time:11:37 am.

Look someone put a video of Camille Davila with Pon Farr up. I am described by the person who uploaded it as "cute keyboard player" which is nice but like, um. Anyway it was much better than the gig in Santa Barbara last Thursday, OMG. bah. synth messed up, made weird noises. awkward crowd. difficult parking. we didn't get drinks tickets or money. bah bah bah. We're going to be playing at the belly up in San Diego next, anyway.
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Tuesday, April 24th, 2007

Time:12:51 am.

First gig ever went awesome, then we drank and yadda yadda yadda. Spent Sunday watching TV, eating, and doing FUCK ALL. I spent 50% of it sleeping, 10% eating, 2% shitting, 18% reading, 20% watching TV. good mix.

People were watching us... like for serious. Very good vibe, but horrible sound no one could hear Camille and my keyboards were too low. but anyway... I was actually not that nervous. I think it's my empathy thing. I have a problem caring about people, and what they think and feel. People were dancing, too.

We play in Santa Barbara on May 10, yup yup

I'm going to fuck Damon Albarn in less than a week! happy! OMG can't wait

Also I kick ass at guitar hero
suck my balls frat boys
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Thursday, January 25th, 2007

Time:6:17 pm.
Who is going to Coachella? Damon Albarn will be there. And Jarvis Cocker. Who else? Bah, I don't give a damn, really. Damon. DAMON!

I can't believe I didn't go see Blur when they played in my city. Irvine, even! I live here. I could bike to the venue. Oh, that's right... it was for KROQ or something. Fuck KROQ.

Also: I wish to go with a person I will not find passed out on the dirt outside of the dance tent.

Also: I wish to go with a person who will not listen to Red Hot Chili Peppers on the way home.

Okay, whatever, here's the list (I AM ALLOWED)

FRIDAY APRIL 27: Björk • Interpol • the Jesus and Mary Chain • Arctic Monkeys• Jarvis Cocker • Sonic Youth Faithless • DJ Shadow • Peeping Tom • Felix Da Housecat • Brazilian Girls• Peaches • Rufus Wainwright • Stephen Marley featuring Jr. Gong • Nickel Creek• We Are Scientists • Digitalism • Tokyo Police Club • Comedians of Comedy • El-P • Julieta Venegas • Gogol Bordello • Circa Survive • Silversun Pickups Gillian Welch • Tilly and the Wall • Benny Benassi • Amy Winehouse • David Guetta • Noisettes • Evil Nine • Busdriver • Brother Ali NOT THE GOOD THE BAD AND THE QUEEN

SATURDAY APRIL 28: The Red Hot Chili Peppers the Arcade Fire • Tiësto • the Decemberists • the Good, the Bad and the Queen • Travis • Kings of Leon • Gotan Project • the Rapture • LCD Soundsystem • Blonde Redhead • the New Pornographers • the Black Keys • !!! • Regina Spektor • Hot Chip • MSTRKRFT • Ozomatli • Ghostface Killah • Fountains of Wayne • Jack’s Mannequin • Peter Bjorn and John • VNV Nation • Sparklehorse • the Nightwatchman • Roky Erickson & the Explosives Cornelius • CocoRosie • Andrew Bird • the Frames • the Fratellis • Justice • Pharoahe Monch • Fields • the Cribs • Girl Talk • Mike Relm • DJ Heather • Pop Levi • Yeva THE GOOD THE BAD AND THE QUEEN PLAYING FOR LIKE, ONE HOUR

SUNDAY APRIL 29: Rage Against the Machine • Manu Chao -Radio Bemba Sound System • Air • Paul van Dyk • Happy Mondays • Willie Nelson • Crowded House • Placebo • Kaiser Chiefs • Damien Rice • the Roots • Explosions in the Sky • Konono No.1 • Soulwax • Richie Hawtin • Infected Mushroom • Lily Allen ● Amos Lee • José González • Spank Rock • Rodrigo Y Gabriela • Against Me! • Ratatat • Junior Boys • the Feeling • the Kooks • CSS • Klaxons • Tapes ‘n Tapes • Teddybears • Lupe Fiasco • Mando Diao ● Grizzly Bear • Mika • the Coup • the Avett Bros. • Anathallo • Fair to Midland ALSO NOT THE GOOD THE BAD THE QUEEN

Travis?!?!? Holy shit, I have been wondering about them. I thought they were at home, with their children. And awwww! Mando Diao! They're at Coachella now, good for them! I always liked them Swedish boys.

Travis, dude. Travis.
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Monday, December 4th, 2006

Time:7:13 pm.

hmm... I'll take that again. HAHA. Til I get what I want.
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